You Just Cant Win

You can't win. You can't break even either.

Sounds like a tongue-in-cheek description of the first two laws of thermodynamics:

• 0th law: there is a game
• 1st law: you can't win
• 2nd law: you can't break even
• 3rd law: You can't even quit the game

Solutions:

• become smaller
• slow time
• lose gracefully

Alternatively

• learn to create energy