It Makesa Fellow Proud To Bea Coder
Yet another TomLehrer song parody (of It Makes a Fellow Proud to be a Soldier, for those not familiar with his discography)
The heart of everyone in this department swells with pride
For the land's elite, the dregs of which, are coding at his side
For the fascinating processes and procedures that we fight
And the strange and buggy software that we're called upon to write
Now Frank, he is a GrayBeard who wrote programs for BigBlue
He clearly knows more about programming than either me or you
He thinks that GUIs are a bunch of hype
He longs for punchcards and teletype
It makes a fellow proud to be a coder
Johnson is a process guy who comes from JPL
He's never written a line of code, I guess it's just as well
His designs are clearly perfect, he cries
(Implementation's left as an exercise)
It makes a fellow proud to be a coder
After Charles got through MS training, he
Was certified in everything DotNet
But his next project, see
Is using EJB
They haven't had the heart to tell him yet...
Prasad is a new college hire, with energy to match
He thinks that we should redesign the enterprise from scratch
"Give me coffee and pizza", he says
"And I'll have it done in a couple of days"
It makes a fellow proud to be a coder
Wei-ling is the solitary woman on our team
And the single guys are all in love with her, it seems
But they have no chance of getting near
She's dating a doctor, or so I hear
It makes a fellow proud to be a coder
Steven is a hacker, who once had to do hard time
For breaking into Citibank (though he didn't steal a dime)
He never comments or tests his code
"If it compiles, it's ready to load!"
It makes a fellow proud to be a coder
Our manager is the bitter, broken type
Passed over for promotion years ago
He's counting down the days
'Til he can slink away
(Assuming that they don't first let him go!)
Richard was a Cobol man, who knew Admiral Grace
But his resume's outdated, and he hasn't kept the pace
A senior analyst back in his day
Now he writes scripts in VBA
It makes a fellow proud to be
As an undergrad I vowed to be
What luck to be allowed to be a co-o-o-o-der! (is it five yet?)