Gambling Pattern Language

Ever been in a casino or at a horse race? Got stocks and bonds? Lost money? Me too. But I stumbled over an old book on the famous 20th century gambler, NickTheGreek, and it's got me thinking there may be smarter ways to risk your dough:

• PlayRational; watch out for GamblingAddiction
• TestTheWater
• PlayWithHouseMoney
• KnowYourGame

more to come ...

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Some more sound advice:

• Offer the odds. If you're the bookie, and you're smart, you don't lose.
  • This ain't gambling. It's business.
• Play with other peoples money, for a percentage. This technique used successfully by stockbrokers for years.
  • This ain't gambling. It's touting.
• Fix the race/stack the deck/bribe the pugilist. Be careful to avoid the law.
  • This ain't gambling; it's theft.
• Give up smoking, gamble what you save. You might not get rich, but you'll live poor longer, and you will end up a little richer than you were when you smoked.
  • This ain't gambling; it's a public service announcement.
• Don't race horses, dogs or pigeons. They can all go faster than you and some of them bite.
  • This ain't gambling. It's veterinary science.
• Only gamble what you can afford to lose. Because you will. One day.
  • Already covered in the patterns above.
• If you can't spot the sucker at the table, it's you